Filed in lifestyle  /  September 27, 2021 /

Now that we know what the dating landscape is like from Dating in the Time of Covid and how to prepare to date with purpose from The Dating Roadmap, let’s get to swiping! 

It’s wildly easy to get excited about online dating but many people hit the first roadblock which is … what on earth am I going to put on my dating profile. Don’t fret friend, we’re going to cover the top 5 tips to optimize your dating profile and get you swiping and matching in no time. 

  1. WRITE A STRONG HOOK – Aside from your profile photo, the first sentence is the first thing that any potential matches see. Your dating profile is not your resume, it’s a reflection of your personality and meant to compliment to your photos. We recognize we’ve assigned you with the difficult task of cramming your entire personality into 1 sentence BUT try it. 

If you’re funny be funny, if you’re serious be serious, if you’re a witty, sensitive, lawyer by day, comedian by night that is addicted to Kombucha and riding a peloton …then be all those things, just be you.

  1. GIVE THEM SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT – With both the body of your bio or your non-main photos, give your audience something to work with – incorporate conversation starters.

Being your first impression, having a diverse profile increases the touchpoints of things you can have in common which makes you approachable online.

Also showcase what is important to you and your hobbies (travel, philanthropy, being active, fine dining, culture, animals, etc.) If you said something in text, try not to be redundant in portraying that in images. Our goal here is to start painting a vivid but alluring picture of what it is like to meet you in person, but in a way that still leaves the audience wanting more and excited to interact and engage. 

  1.  BE AUTHENTIC– The most important thing is to authentically describe yourself and not be someone who you are not. It’s seductive to embellish on your profile (or use the best photos that are 5 years old) in the hopes that this will attract your ideal mate. 

Embellishing or misrepresenting yourself has the potential to blow up in your pretty face by preventing you from attracting an authentic match. This golden rule applies to both photos, bio description and in conversation (online and in-person). 

This is the #1 dating tip to save yourself time and heartache. You’ll never regret being honest. 

  1. GET A 2ND OPINION – Having always approached dating with a business mindset (this is what dating in New York City for 7 years will do to a girl), I preferred to ask for dating profile advice from experts: professional marketers, my therapist or a couple trusted friends who have had success with online dating. 

Asking a friend or even a colleague (only if appropriate) who has a strong marketing background is great because this is essentially what online dating is, you are marketing yourself! 

I reviewed my entire dating profile and matches thoroughly with my therapist – who better to ask than a trusted professional who knows me so well and who also by law (thanks to HIPPA) must keep all my secrets. 

It’s a great idea to ask a friend who has had success with online dating and perhaps is in a relationship because it eliminates the competition factor that you’re both swimming in the same pool. Friends who have succeeded in the online dating space are more likely to have better tips that lead to attracting a great match. 

  1. PHOTOS, PHOTOS, PHOTOS – The photos curated on your dating profile tell a visual story. I joined forces with Elizabeth Jones, photographer for the modern woman, to create a list of  the best tips to enhance the photography on your dating profile. 


  • Use high-resolution or the highest quality images with the best possible lighting
  • Ditch the filters that alter what you really look like, we don’t your date surprised when they show up. As mentioned above, GOOD LIGHTING IS YOUR BEST FRIEND!
  • Diversify images. Profile close up, full body, waist up, indoors, outdoors, doing an activity, hobby/interest
  • Limit group photos to 1 – eliminate any possible confusion on who YOU are 
  • Complete your photo gallery, yes all of them
  • Use recent photos within the past year (I know what you’re thinking, seriously it’s Covid times. Okay, okay let’s say since January 2020). Posting photos from when you were in the best shape that is breaking tip #3


  • Use low-resolution or dark images
  • Only have 1 image
  • Have multiple group images

If you loved this article, go back and read the previous articles, Dating in the Time of Covid and The Dating Roadmap, in this dating series. Follow Bare by Elizabeth on Instagram and Facebook for more on sex, wellness, lifestyle and culture for the modern woman. 

Part 3 of a short series on dating for the modern woman. 

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Kalu Ndukwe Kalu

The things you do for yourself are gone when you are gone, but the things you do for others remain as your legacy.